endless love

stating that I am afraid of love
is an understatement of magnificent proportions
but it has taken your face
and your smile
and your love of life
to show that love is still sitting in my corner
waiting on me,
waiting for me to acknowledge it
waiting to engulf me like a tidal wave during a typhoon
waiting on me to give up control
waiting on me to let go
waiting
waiting
waiting
while that final tear slides slowly down my cheek


your face follows me into my dreams
mending my broken heart
night after night
so that with the passing of time
so goes the passing of my former relationship
the one that almost destroyed me
the one that was attended by a child
and not a woman
the one that even now produces several wracking sobs
instead of an all night vigil


your warmth follows me into my visions
whispering promises of peace
and planting seeds of trust
seeds of joy…..
seeds of love
cauterizing long dead ties
to long dead affairs
and harmful consociations
drawing out of me those things which
will allow thoughts of you
thoughts of me
thoughts of us
to fall into fertile ground

your enduring serenity follows me into my heart
where you have been patiently waiting on me to love myself
because you knew that through that,
I could love you.
cultivating it to receive your seed
but wise enough
and altruistic enough
to only desire my happiness
should fate take me away in another direction
but always hoping
hoping
hoping to receive a yield
from my blossoming newfound love

copyrighted 2004